Have A Maleficent day!

“I know you, I walked with you once upon a dream
I know you, that look in your eyes is so familiar a gleam
And I know it's true that visions are seldom all they seem
But if I know you, I know what you'll do
You'll love me at once, the way you did once upon a dream”
Once Upon A Dream Lyrics – Sleeping Beauty - Lana Del Ray

Some say I’m a Disney junkie, others that I am obsessed with Angelina Jolie. But those who know me best know that both of those are true! And today the movie I have been waiting so long for is finally in theaters and I am getting off work early to go and see it!

Any excuse to leave work early on a Friday is a good excuse, but this one has been long anticipated!

Let the countdown begin…

The Cost Of Happiness

Little girls don’t dream of growing up and having their own children through assisted reproduction methods. In fact, until I found out that this was what I needed to do in order to have children of my own, I really didn’t know much about IUI, IVM, IVF etc… let alone what any of those acronyms stood for! I was also completely unaware of the associated costs. Whoever says that money can’t buy happiness has never learned that they can only have children through IVF because you need a whole lot of money to get what you want!

I have spreadsheets detailing all of the costs over the years and it’s just incredible. Back in 2010 my rounds of IVM medications alone cost about 5600$ (1300$ out of pocket thanks to insurance) and my cancelled IVF back in 2012 cost about 1850$ (425$ out of pocket this time). But when you break that down to a day by day cost, some days were costing me 200$ or more! That’s a lot to deal with when you have to pay everything up front and then wait for your insurance claims to be completed and refunded. But don’t get me wrong, I am not complaining because this is considered to be cheap now that the Quebec government is paying for treatments; the only thing they don’t cover is the medication. I am extremely grateful for this!

Actually, I was talking to a friend recently about by upcoming (and somewhat dreaded) 35th birthday and the cost of treatments whenever we decide to start again. Jokingly, he suggested everyone should buy me a shot – and not the kind with alcohol, the injections! I might seriously have to consider this idea though; joke or not, it’s not a bad plan!

Our new clinic is also semi-private which means that while treatment itself is still covered, all of the diagnostic testing we have been going through is not. I have spent anywhere from 100$ - 450$ each time we walk in that place (also covered by insurance, mostly) but it has all been worth it and I am glad we did it. The staff is so much nicer than most of the people at the hospital, the appointments are actually on time, and when I make an appointment to see my doctor I actually see MY doctor and not an army of residents. I understand the need for teaching hospitals, but I am tired of feeling like a lab rat; I have paid those dues over and over again!

So if you see me or DH panhandling one of these days, you know why!

A Poem For My BFF

Just Because

Our paths crossed, so long ago,

And immediately, our bond began to grow.

A blossoming friendship, that no one could break,

Not even the years we spent apart could test our fate.

Looking back on the decades we’ve spent together,

I know we will be by each others side forever and ever.

You bring me comfort, you always know just what to say,

and you make me smile, even miles away.

Your husband is lucky to call you his wife,

and your son will be proud to call you mother,

but to me you are more special than words can describe,

because to me you are like no other!

I was fortunate to meet you,

I have felt privileged to know you.

And although we come from different trees,

family is what you will always be to me.

Love you to the moon and back!

The Baptism

“Every good and perfect gift is from above…” 

James 1:17 

Almost a year has passed since we first found out my SIL was pregnant, and it’s funny how things turn out to be sometimes...

I never wrote anything about this before, but when the announcement was made last summer I was completely torn apart and devastated by it. I was extremely happy for the parents-to-be, but I was already so sensitive and fragile about our own TTC situation at the time that it put me into a pretty dark place for quite some time. Everything that I was already feeling intensified, things that I had buried were uncovered and a mixture of new emotions appeared as well.

It took me a while to get out of my own head and deal with the issues in front of me/us but, looking back now, I believe it was that downward spiral that actually helped propel us forward and get us to where we are today. Sometimes you need to hit bottom to get back up again!

My faith in science and medicine is far stronger than my beliefs in blessings or miracles, and I have no faith in “a higher power” where TTC is concerned. But I do believe in love, I know that I have nothing if I have no hope and most of all I do believe that we will succeed one of these days! And I think in a small way, this little girl helped restore those feelings for me.

And, with that said, on May 18th, DH and I officially became Godparents to niece #2! Ok, so technically he became the Godfather and I became a "Witness" since I am not Catholic, but whatever! I commissioned a special card to commemorate the occasion (pictured below with a link to the designer) and put together a gift basket including a beautiful cross that sort of resembles a butterfly too, a gift certificate to have her ears pierced, a set of Cinderella and The Fairy Godmother books, and a little stuffed animal for her to cuddle.

And, in addition, I was able to add to my Tiffany jewellery collection! One down, so many more to go... I love it, thank you!

Thank you both once again for giving us this gift and honor! It was our pleasure.

 

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