Just over a year and a half ago I bought a car from an old friend of mine after her father had passed away. It was sentimental in a way because back when I was 17 or 18 I had bought my first car off of him as well and it was the same manufacturer too.
Now, don't get me wrong, I liked the car a lot along with the freedom it gave me (even though I didn't use it much), but having to do repair after repair was starting to drive me crazy. Not only that, the first was about 200$, the second 300$ and this one was quoted at 500$ if nothing else went wrong in the process (it needed a new gas tank). The garage I go to is owned by the same people I bought the car from so I have no reason not to trust them as they are friends. So I was relieved (and I cannot stress that enough) when they made me an offer to buy the car back instead of putting me in the poor house! They will fix it and sell it and hopefully make a small profit!
Now, I know this is going to sound strange, but today while selling the car my friend told me that she feels like her dad is haunting her with this car. First she had to sell it, then they repaired it over and over and now they bought it back again. I laughed, but I realized something when she said this. When I told my grandmother I was going to buy this car she was very upset. She was afraid of me driving and getting hurt. So, I bought the car but told her that I had backed out of the deal to make her feel better and she was very happy to hear this. My plan was to get better at driving and then suprise her with a trip out in the car later on in the summer but she passed away not too long afterwards and this got me thinking...
I am now starting to wonder if, after her death, she found out that I had in fact bought the car against her wishes... found my friends father up in heaven (or whereever they are) and plotted against us! Not to be mean spirited, but just for a laugh! I can see both her father and my grandmother doing this to us! I know that this sounds far-fetched, but you never know!!!
Regardless of why all of this has happened I am happy to say that, although I am now car-free, I have learned a whole lot about cars, I know what I am looking for in the future and I have gained more confidence in myself driving. I have already started a 2013 budget to help me plan for a new car in Spring hopefully. And, all of this allowed me to reconnect with an old friend after more than 10 years apart... and that is prieless!
Friday, December 28, 2012
Thursday, December 27, 2012
12 Things To Know Before Letting Go
I don’t remember where I first copied this from, but I knew it was something that I needed to remember. So, with 2013 around the corner I have decided to refresh my memory...
Often times letting go has nothing to do with weakness, and everything to do with strength. We let go and walk away not because we want the universe to realize our worth, but because we finally realize our own worth. And that’s what this article is about – realizing your worth, and harnessing this realization to identify the negative ideas, habits, and people in your life that you need to let go of.
Here are some points to consider:
1. The past can steal your present if you let it. – You can spend hours, days, weeks, months, or even years sitting alone in a dark room, over-analyzing a situation from the past, trying to put the pieces together, justifying what could’ve or should’ve happened. Or you can just leave the pieces on the floor and walk out the front door into the sunlight to get some fresh air.
2. Not everyone, and not everything, is meant to stay. – There are things you don’t want to happen, but have to accept, things you don’t want to know, but have to learn, and people you can’t live without but have to let go. Some circumstances and people come into your life just to strengthen you, so you can move on without them.
3. Happiness is not the absence of problems, but the ability to deal with them. – Imagine all the wondrous things your mind might embrace if it weren’t wrapped so tightly around your struggles. Always look at what you have, instead of what you have lost. Because it’s not what the world takes away from you that counts; it’s what you do with what you have left.
4. Sometimes you just need to do your best and surrender the rest. – Don’t be too hard on yourself. There are plenty of people willing to do that for you. Tell yourself, “I am doing the best I can with what I have in this moment. And that is all I can expect of anyone, including me.” Love yourself and be proud of everything that you do, even your mistakes. Because even mistakes mean you’re trying.
5. You are in control of one person, and one person only: yourself. – There is only one way to happiness, and that is to cease worrying about things which are beyond the power of your control. Letting go in your relationships doesn’t always mean that you don’t care about people anymore; it’s simply realizing that the only person you really have control over is yourself.
6. What’s right for you may be wrong for others, and vice versa. – Think for yourself, and allow others the privilege of doing so too. We all dance to the beat of a different drum. There are few absolute ‘rights’ and ‘wrongs’ in the world. You need to live your life your way – the way that’s right for you.
7. Some people will refuse to accept you for who you are. – Always choose to be true to yourself, even at the risk of incurring ridicule from others, rather than being a fake and incurring the pain and confusion of trying to be someone you’re not. When you are comfortable in your skin not everyone in this world will like you, and that’s okay. You could be the ripest, juiciest apple in the world, and there’s going to be someone out there who hates apples.
8. Relationships can only exist on a steady foundation of truth. – When there is breakdown in a relationship, you must have the hard conversation. It may not be pretty and it may not feel good. But if you are willing to listen and tell the truth, it will open up. When you build relationships based on truth and authenticity, rather than masks, false perfection, and being phony, your relationships will heal, connect, and thrive.
9. The world changes when you change. – Practice really seeing whatever it is you’re looking at. You are today where your thoughts and perceptions have brought you; you will be tomorrow where your thoughts and perceptions take you. If you truly want to change your life, you must first change your mind. The world around you changes when you change.
10. You can make decisions, or you can make excuses. – Life is a continuous exercise in creative problem solving. A mistake doesn’t become a failure until you refuse to correct it. Thus, most long-term failures are the outcome of people who make excuses instead of decisions. Read The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People.
11. It usually takes just a few negative remarks to kill a person’s dream. – Don’t kill people’s dreams with negative words, and don’t put up with those who do. Don’t let people interrupt you and tell you that you can’t do something. If you have a dream that you’re passionate about, you must protect it. When others can’t do something themselves, they’re going to tell you that you can’t do it either; and that’s a lie. These people are simply speaking from within the boundaries of their own limitations.
12. Sometimes walking away is the only way to win. – Never waste your time trying to explain yourself to people who have proven that they are committed to misunderstanding you. In other words, don’t define your intelligence by the number of arguments you have won, but by the number of times you have said, “This needless nonsense is not worth my time.”
Often times letting go has nothing to do with weakness, and everything to do with strength. We let go and walk away not because we want the universe to realize our worth, but because we finally realize our own worth. And that’s what this article is about – realizing your worth, and harnessing this realization to identify the negative ideas, habits, and people in your life that you need to let go of.
Here are some points to consider:
1. The past can steal your present if you let it. – You can spend hours, days, weeks, months, or even years sitting alone in a dark room, over-analyzing a situation from the past, trying to put the pieces together, justifying what could’ve or should’ve happened. Or you can just leave the pieces on the floor and walk out the front door into the sunlight to get some fresh air.
2. Not everyone, and not everything, is meant to stay. – There are things you don’t want to happen, but have to accept, things you don’t want to know, but have to learn, and people you can’t live without but have to let go. Some circumstances and people come into your life just to strengthen you, so you can move on without them.
3. Happiness is not the absence of problems, but the ability to deal with them. – Imagine all the wondrous things your mind might embrace if it weren’t wrapped so tightly around your struggles. Always look at what you have, instead of what you have lost. Because it’s not what the world takes away from you that counts; it’s what you do with what you have left.
4. Sometimes you just need to do your best and surrender the rest. – Don’t be too hard on yourself. There are plenty of people willing to do that for you. Tell yourself, “I am doing the best I can with what I have in this moment. And that is all I can expect of anyone, including me.” Love yourself and be proud of everything that you do, even your mistakes. Because even mistakes mean you’re trying.
5. You are in control of one person, and one person only: yourself. – There is only one way to happiness, and that is to cease worrying about things which are beyond the power of your control. Letting go in your relationships doesn’t always mean that you don’t care about people anymore; it’s simply realizing that the only person you really have control over is yourself.
6. What’s right for you may be wrong for others, and vice versa. – Think for yourself, and allow others the privilege of doing so too. We all dance to the beat of a different drum. There are few absolute ‘rights’ and ‘wrongs’ in the world. You need to live your life your way – the way that’s right for you.
7. Some people will refuse to accept you for who you are. – Always choose to be true to yourself, even at the risk of incurring ridicule from others, rather than being a fake and incurring the pain and confusion of trying to be someone you’re not. When you are comfortable in your skin not everyone in this world will like you, and that’s okay. You could be the ripest, juiciest apple in the world, and there’s going to be someone out there who hates apples.
8. Relationships can only exist on a steady foundation of truth. – When there is breakdown in a relationship, you must have the hard conversation. It may not be pretty and it may not feel good. But if you are willing to listen and tell the truth, it will open up. When you build relationships based on truth and authenticity, rather than masks, false perfection, and being phony, your relationships will heal, connect, and thrive.
9. The world changes when you change. – Practice really seeing whatever it is you’re looking at. You are today where your thoughts and perceptions have brought you; you will be tomorrow where your thoughts and perceptions take you. If you truly want to change your life, you must first change your mind. The world around you changes when you change.
10. You can make decisions, or you can make excuses. – Life is a continuous exercise in creative problem solving. A mistake doesn’t become a failure until you refuse to correct it. Thus, most long-term failures are the outcome of people who make excuses instead of decisions. Read The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People.
11. It usually takes just a few negative remarks to kill a person’s dream. – Don’t kill people’s dreams with negative words, and don’t put up with those who do. Don’t let people interrupt you and tell you that you can’t do something. If you have a dream that you’re passionate about, you must protect it. When others can’t do something themselves, they’re going to tell you that you can’t do it either; and that’s a lie. These people are simply speaking from within the boundaries of their own limitations.
12. Sometimes walking away is the only way to win. – Never waste your time trying to explain yourself to people who have proven that they are committed to misunderstanding you. In other words, don’t define your intelligence by the number of arguments you have won, but by the number of times you have said, “This needless nonsense is not worth my time.”
Tuesday, December 4, 2012
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